A friend keeps 'borrowing' things and not returning them. How do I get my stuff back without a fight?

Vague hints don't work on this kind of friend — specific and direct does. 1. Text them directly, no hedging: "Hey, can you drop off the drill this weekend? I need it for a project." A specific item and a specific timeframe is much harder to keep forgetting than a general "hey you still have my stuff." 2. Stop lending the next item until the last one comes back. This isn't petty, it's just how borrowing is supposed to work, and you're allowed to say so plainly: "happy to lend that once I get the drill back." 3. If it's a pattern across years, not just one item, it's worth saying once, calmly: "I've noticed I don't usually get stuff back — can we figure out a system, or should I just not lend things anymore?" That's a real conversation, not an accusation. Most friendships survive "can I get that back" just fine. What they don't survive as well is years of quiet resentment because nobody said the direct thing.